This love game is damned. It was damned from its origin in the garden of Eden and it will be damned to its inevitable end. The day love dies will birth the destruction of humanity.
A short piece of what I wrote tonight. Probably a good chunk of this was for therapuetic reasons. I had to write to clean out my system and I feel so liberated.
Today was really good because I took a short break from texting people a lot today. Well, sort of. I mean, there’s one particular person I didn’t text which was fine. i think I needed some space to think about my feelings and shit about them. I’m just trying to ready myself for a relationship. Maybe? If things go well. But, then again, I’m not really trying to rush things. Today was a good day to self-meditate and do small little chores that took up time and stopped me from thinking for a bit.
I hope that I can figure things out as quickly as possible. Although the attention is fabulous, I know it won’t last until I make a decision. I just like the feeling of being wanted and desired. It fuels my ego and self-esteem. And, fuck it, sometimes I need that, too.